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Game of Thrones: Week Two Power Rankings


1. Arya Stark

You don’t just single handedly kill a room full of soldiers, sack a house, and spit verbal game all over the place and get knocked off in one episode. Just

kidding this is Game of Thrones, the tides are always shifting. And even though we have seen a new character emerge as the new leader for overall points this week (Euron “I own several Hot Topic Franchises” Greyjoy), Arya still in my mind holds an upper hand at the #1 spot. We can only hope she arrives in Winterfell safely and is able to get back on track to crossing more names off her list. We should know in the next episode or two if her status will allow her to maintain a top spot in the standings.

2. Euron Greyjoy

So, I was wrong about the Dragon Horn in last week’s breakdown. Big whoop. It turns out that maybe Euron’s late entrance into the series may benefit him in this season’s fantasy league after all. The amount of screen time he has seen since his entrance as well as his purpose/status/effectiveness and potential have been going, he could just be a candidate for ‘Sleeper of the Year’. Now that he has his gift to give to Cersei, and evened the playing field a bit with Daenerys we can expect, for the remained of this season at least, to remain within the Top 10 on the Power Rankings.

3. Jon Snow

This pick may be a bit biased, but fuck it. That’s right fuckers. My #1 draft pick is about to show the fuck up. He’s gonna come in howling to Danereys and have some solid conversation with Tyrion and the lot on how to get this Dragonglass. Alliances will lead to celebration and drinking, drinking will lead to Jon and Dany kissing in a tree (or some secluded room in Dragonstone - same shit), and this kissing will lead to the mouth-watering scene we’ve all been waiting for titled: “A Song of Fire and Ice” or as I like to call it; “Go DJ, That’s My DJ” (think about this one people).

4. The Hound

We didn’t get any info on The Hound in Episode 2…damn HBO writer cunts. With that said, he’s still in a solid spot to hedge your bets. We can only hope for a reunion between Arya and Sandor Clegane, a peaceful reunion that is, at Winterfell soon.

5. Daenerys Targaryen

Regardless of Dany getting absolutely fucked in the ass by Euron and his fleet, she still has Dragons. And as long as Dany has Dragons, she will always have a spot in the Top 10 Power Rankings. Or atleast in my Top 10 Power Rankings. Please find me some sap on theringer.com who would probably disagree with this because he doesn’t have a good feeling about a woman coming into power or some shit (he may have a point). The only thing I have concern with Deanery’s is her path to power, and how said power will affect her mentally like it did her father. Also – has anyone noticed that not only Cersei is wearing all black, but Dany is also now a patron for a black-only wardrobe? Is this a civil rights movement from the costume designer or a purposeful connection to be made between Queen’s and their corrupted minds?

6. Cersei Lannister

From episode 1 the motto for Cersei was “if Euron wins, I win”. And with Euron’s huge victory on Sunday, Cersei indirectly also won big. Now how this will ultimately play out for her is still very much unclear seeing that Euron is a scumbag who should never be trusted. But Cersei trusts one thing and one thing only, power. She now has an extra pawn on her side in the wars to come.

7. Petyr Baelish

For a man who currently has 0 overall points this season, he is one dangerous snake to have in your lineup. Let me explain. Back in Season 1, Ned Stark took blackmail from Petyr with a sour act of choking the man out. In this season’s latest episode, Jon Snow lashes out in a familiar fashion by choking Petyr in the crypts over a comment made about Sansa. We all know what happened to Ned, Petyr was essentially the one that got him put in the Red Keep. We can only assume Littlefinger isn’t just going to forget about this incident with Jon and further his attempts at breaking down The King in the North. Be on the lookout for a potential boom matchup in the coming weeks.

8. Samwell Tarly

Now that we know Sam hates the Citadel and is doing pretty much whatever he can to be a little devilish (for Sam’s standards), we may see the theory of “Sam and Jorah visit Dragonstone” become reality. Knowing Jorah’s conditions, and Sam’s ties to the rest of Westeros, it makes complete sense for Sam to do something a little edgy soon – especially with the massive amounts of screen time he has gotten for little to no action. It will only be a matter of time before some Wit and Status points come his way.

9. Jorah Mormont

If my ranking of Sam is at #8, Jorah must be #9. These ranks can probably be swapped in various leaderboards and scoring formats. But essentially the theory breaks down these two as a dynamic duo. Who will protect Sam on the way to Dragonstone? Jorah. Who will ultimately get the status points for saving Jorah’s life? Sam. It’s a win-win storyline with these two characters. Solid plug and play options any given Sunday.

10. Sansa Stark

Similar to my breakdown of the Sam/Jorah combo. If my theory on Petyr Baelish’s retribution on Jon Snow remains intact, then Sansa will have some potential for sacking points, as well as conversational points and even sex/nudity points if she really falls down the rabbit hole and pork’s Petyr. We all know Jordan is riding heavy on some heavy riding from Sansa this season as her character’s actress may now finally be of age for Jordan (15 years…maybe 14 according to some TMZ reporters). Lots of theories hold these last 4 picks in this week’s Power Rankings together. Consider them all Flex positions for the coming matchups.

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