Patrick Graham. You’re getting married today. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to one-up the letter you gave me last night. I could make a joke about it being kinda gay, but that’s not me. I don’t write jokes like that. Instead, I reciprocate with dedicating a Digest to you on your special day.
I know, I know, I went 5-0 last weekend. But today isn’t about me. It’s about Pat. What do I have to say about this crumb creep. He’s a real lush (see below). And I mean lush in a good way, like the way an Irish alcoholic’s cheeks are always real ‘lush’. The dude could not be more Positive Vibes Only. I’m blessed to have him on my side when I’m lights out and think I’m gonna put someone else's lights out (I can’t). Pat, you’re a true friend. So true, that when I told you to request a Digest song last night, I didn’t hear you. Unluckily, you texted it to me. I listened to it during my morning brew-ha, and hated every minute of it. I didn’t expect anything less. Love you kid, let's make some honeymoon mula.
P.S. Did you know that diddler Dalai Lama vistied the Bethlehem Hotel?
(3) Michigan @ Maryland: Michigan -18.5
Did you guys see this clip?
Final Score: Michigan 42, Maryland 21
(22) Utah @ (17) Arizona: Utah ML
Arizona has had a run, I’ll give them that. But who hasn’t had a run? Utah. This defense wants to feast on Thanksgiving turkey early like it’s a Wawa Gobbler with extra gravy.
Final Score: Utah 21, Arizona 17
(1) Georgia @ (18) Tennessee: Georgia -10
So many idiots. So many. There’s too many idiots. Tennessee beat Alabama less than 365 days ago. They’re not getting another field-goal-post-in-the-river game for like a decade. Take the fuckin points.
Final Score: Georgia 35, Tennessee 21
(5) Washington @ (11) Oregon State: Under 62.5
This is wild. No I mean, wild. An undefeated Washington, Hiesman candidate Michael Penix, are underdogs. Everything in my gambling soul says Oregon State -1.5. They’re begging the public to jump on Washington. It would be very aligned with my ‘PAC 12 always shits the bed’ take. But I can’t do it. Instead, I figure if a prolific offense is going to be against Vegas, there’s a reason.
Final Score: Oregon State 32, Washington 28
Georgia State @ (15) LSU: LSU -32
The real Heisman, Jayden Daniels, is going to fucking TEAR. SHIT. UP.
Final Score: LSU 100, Georgia State 3
No #PremiumMemberTickleTeaser, I am enjoying Bloody Mary’s and not worried about giving you all another scratch off.
Running Record: (232-204-7)
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