The Degenerate Digest v.66

Brilliant minds know when a trend is building. They can look at the chart and say, oh yea - this is going in the right direction. After an abysmal Week 3 (1-5), we went after some dogs last week and while not having a true winning week (2-3), the charts say we’re on our way back to the money. That’s what the brilliant minds would say, I chose to listen to their opinions on this trend.

One of my best friends is getting married today. Jon, if you’re reading this - congratulations. But also fuck you. The Week 5 slate is loaded with hit after hit after hit like a Boner Jams ‘03 playlist.

The fact that I’m going to be missing out on all of these games to celebrate your eternal love is just a real dick move. With that said, I’m going to embrace the vibe. The Digest could use some love after the past couple of performances. So while all of the excitement and entertainment is going down on the gridiron, I’ll be making sure the energy is right with some night fever on the dance floor. We’re harnessing the power of love this week, onto the picks!

(14) Michigan @ Wisconsin: Wisconsin ML

Don’t get me wrong, Wisconsin stinks. It’s true, they do. But you know what stinks more? The Michigan Wolverines record. They are by far the most fraudulent 4-0 team in college football. They almost gave the game away to their best opponent of the season last week in Rutgers. They just haven’t had a real test yet. Wisconsin got annihilated by the Irish last week and are heading back to Camp Randall foaming at the mouth to bring it to their rivals in front of a sold out crowd. This game is going to be gross, so gross that the O/U is currently set at 43.5! That’s just insanity for a college football game. If it’s a game that’s going to be gross, there’s no choice other than to ride with the home team. Not to mention the fact the Badgers historically own Michigan and it’s really not close.

Final Score: Wisconsin 24, Michigan 21

Louisville @ (24) Wake Forest: Wake Forest -7

While Lousivlle on paper has had some success, if you watch any of their games you know how much of a mess they actually are. On the other side of the field, the Demon Deacons are on paper a bit more average. But if you’ve watched any of their games you know how put together they actually are. This game is going to be won because of the system built at Trust Field. The program is actually working and working well. Organization vs. chaos. Trust the Demon Deacons today.

Final Score: Wake Forest 34, Louisville 24

(12) Ole Miss @ (1) Alabama: Match & Under Parlay Alabama & U80.5

Everyone and their mother is talking about this game being an electric shootout. I expect points but I mean let's get real here. Ole Miss hasn’t played a soul. And Alabama’s offense, while getting themselves together, was only able to put up 31 against Florida. Is Florida’s defense THAT much different than Ole Miss? I just refuse to believe both offenses are going to have consistent success today. Realistically, I think Alabama gets an early lead of about 2 or 3 touchdowns and then goes into a ‘conserve the lead’ game plan. I almost want to be wrong about this pick, but I just don’t feel like going with every single analyst out there this week saying this will be a 52-45 game. I just don’t see that happening.

Final Score: Alabama 42, Ole Miss 27

(7) Cincinnati @ (9) Notre Dame: Under 50.5

Another thick sack alert on the card this week. I think Cincinnati has to win this game if they actually want to be taken seriously and do something special this season. While I trust they can beat Notre Dame, the real concern here is a slow start that will 100% happen. It is because of that slow start that we’re laying our nuts on Vegas's drum set and taking the under here. I wouldn’t be shocked if this game is 10-7 at the half. Just a bunch of punts from both offenses to start, waiting for someone to break loose. This feels like a ‘last team with the ball wins’ game after the offenses figure it out in the 4th quarter and the defenses are gassed. I’m hoping Luke Fickle and the Bearcats can pull it off in South Bend.

Final Score: Cincinnati 24, Notre Dame 17

Indiana @ (4) Penn State: Penn State -12.5

Honestly, this line scares me a bit. Mainly because it makes no sense. Indiana stinks. Could this be a look ahead spot for the Nittany Lions eyeing up a road matchup against currently #5 ranked Iowa who just smoked Maryland by almost 50 last night? Possibly. But it’s only possible in the first half. A night game at Beaver Stadium just does not disappoint especially when Penn State is in the Top 10. Even if they struggle early, they will get it together in time for a cover here thanks to the electricity of the crowd. Happy Valley is going to be rocking tonight. Sorry Indiana, but enjoy your Berkey Creamery order and just forget this game ever happened.

Final Score: Penn State 32, Indiana 17

Running Record: (105-86-3)